Alive and Well

Well its been 21 days since my last writing and one would have to imagine that it is impossible to be so busy that you can't take a few moments to write a small blog at least once in that time span. Well think what you will but we have been busy.

My wife and I just finished our move from NJ to Vermont. This is now our 6th move in 24 years of marriage. If you'd like to test your marriage (and I'm not sure why anyone would like to test their marriage), try moving. What's that you say. Having kids is harder; poppycock (I always wanted to write that) having kids was fun - raising them was a little more trying but moving is compressed pressure. Now, I have to admit, if my wife and I were telling this story together she would be injectung things like (what did you do?) etc. as I tell this story. Now you know why I blog. If she would like to tell it from her perspective let her write her own blog.

Imagine trying to sell your house in a market when both Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are gasping for air like an asthma patient in a dust storm. You have to be nuts. Meet Mr. and Mrs. Cashew. In any event we put our house on the market and it sold in 4 days. Isn't that a stupid expression!!! It didn't sell in 4 days. We had an offer within 4 days which we accepted. Then all hell broke loose. The banks started crumbling like ancient Greek columns in an apocalyptic earth quake. The stock market dropped like bombs during the London air raid. With every passing day my stomach would flip thinking that the kids had found a way to override the worlds computers in an effort to prevent us from ever selling this house while belly dancing and tangoing (is that a word) their way through university.

The inspection happened and we had been told that it went very well. Well is very relative. We should have had an inkling of things to come when the radon inspection took longer than the creation of heaven and earth. Now I realize god is God but from now on I'm calling god for a radon inspection. The inspection came in with the normal riders like your house is falling down because I saw a crack in the downstairs window but we muddled our way through those issues. Then it was suggested that the buyers needed to obtain a chiminey inspection. This advise was offered up by the law firm of Dewey, Cheatum & Howe. Lo and behold, this law firm also happens to refer chiminey inspectors called Just Inspect. Let the cavity search begin. Just Inspect unlike what the name suggests also happens to perform the repairs of whatever work is found and even has the audacity to suggest that if the report of their findings is helpful in a real estate transaction that they be considered for the work. (I am shocked, shocked that their is gambling in this casino). You guessed it. Our chiminey's needed work. Lots and lots of work. In fact the suggested repairs would equal that of the Icelandic national debt (prior to bankruptcy).

Pass the Tums and my checkbook.

Let that not be the end of the story, because our lawyer (his paralegal) decided to just ballpark the figure and reduce our monies due by $15,000. and just when you'd think everything was done the Dewey lawyer called to say that there was garbage on the front lawn. Can you imagine that on garbage day there would be garbage outside the house. Oh yeah and leaves in a leaf bag in October - its an outrage!!! And these people have the vote. ughhhhhhhhhh!!!!